Tales of Scorching Wit !

What's the matter?

2009-12-09T02:04:00.001+05:30

I still haven't found a job. I don't have time. What am I doing wrong? Why is it so hard to just get a job!!

Still hoping that things work out soon.

in reference to: CommuniGate Pro ritz.edu Entrance (view on Google Sidewiki)

Hopeless...Confused....Still hoping!

2009-07-28T23:17:00.001+05:30

I don't know whats wrong. Its like i just hit a wall. I don't know what to do, how and where to start. What will happen in the next moments. Its like I am just forced to go with the flow and I am hopelessly flowing with it. What's in it for me??!!! How will I get what I hoped for!!!?

I really hope that I pull it all together, as soon as possible. Time is changing sides.

One of these mornings, Won't be very long, You will look for me, And I'll be gone.

Blogged with the Flock Browser

Payday^

2009-02-13T08:35:00.000+05:30

Well I got my first pay check here. Man, they have paydays every two weeks. That’s so cool. Never have to wait an entire month to see money in your account!! Still waiting for my SSN. Will have a phone and internet then. So eager to get back in touch with my world again.

Never underestimate the predictability of stupidity!! B-T T

More in the near future.

Nostalgia!??

2009-02-03T02:31:00.001+05:30

I really don’t know what prompted me to write this. I guess, it was long overdue. Anyway, it’s so weird; I just felt like writing all this down but really don’t have appropriate words to describe it. Well slowly settling in Louisville, work is good. Don’t know many people here yet, apart from work really have nothing to do. And it’s very cold, worse than Switzerland actually.

Well, I was listening to some Hindi songs. Jaane Tu Ya Jaane Na (2008) movie/soundtrack, I remembered that when Dad and I were on our way to Mumbai we watched this one on the bus. We went to meet Mama (uncle); I was going to see him after nearly 2.5 years. It was so good to see them all. But the song which really brought everything up in my mind is the song from the movie Kismet Connection (2008). I remembered that day, 09/01/2009, Friday. Dad and I saw this movie on the bus on the way back to Pune from Mumbai. I have such a dodgy feeling right now. Nevertheless, at that time it hit me hard, real hard that I had just 1 week to leave for US. It was a very memorable trip with my Dad. We had to walk quiet a lot because of the nationwide truckers’ strike and because of that there was no fuel in Mumbai. So no taxis just buses and they were so packed. It was stressful, but some way or the other we made it everywhere that too on time. Thanks to Dad, he is such a great chap. Well he also got a new car the day we left for the visa, 08/01/2009. It was so great…

Then we were back again in Mumbai, nearly a week after with the new car. You know, no matter how much time I (you) spend with your parents or even in Pune (at home), it’s always too less. I (you) always wish that I (you) could have some more time to spend and I will be with all of the folks back home. I hope you agree. But well…

Thanks Dad, Mom I could never had done all this without your unconditional support. I owe you so much; words are not capable of describing it. I miss you so much. Not forgetting, all my friends back home and all of you who I met in Suisse. It’s always great to think about all the times we all spent together. I wish that it may never end and we continue to have great time and keep bumping into each other frequently!! Hope to see you all soon. Time flies you know.

Missing Pune, Bouveret, Zurich and Montreux very much.

Take care ya’ll!!

Of gas, fake fish and stuff...

2009-01-24T08:15:00.006+05:30

Officially starting work tomorrow. The coworkers seem nice, lets see how they really are in due course. Signed the lease for the apartment, opened an account, shopped at Walmart for apartment supplies and the only thing remaining is the phone. I will have that after I get my SSN.

Yesterday, I was at the doctor for the mandatory pre-employment drug test with my colleague. I saw on the TV an astonishing news. I am sure, anything and mostly everything weird has to happen in the US!! The news was about fake olive oil, fake chips and fake fish!! In many places, there was fake fish being sold in the market; namely salmon and cod. The fish meat is artificially flavored and colored. So ridiculous!! I thought India and China were good in this, but hats off to the guys in US.

Anyway the other day I was having coffee with my Indian colleague. She said the most awesomely brilliant thing. The conversation went,"They should start this in India, its so like clean, you know." I say,"What should they start?" "They use 'gas' as fuel here, everything runs on it, not petrol!" I reply,"Yes we have that in India as well, but mostly buses or taxis run on CNG (gas) as fuel, but we use mostly petrol or diesel for vehicles. She started arguing and tried to prove her point that we don't use 'gas' in India as fuel for vehicles. Then I realized what she meant, she misunderstood 'gas' (GASOLINE) as gas (CNG). When I said its the same as petrol as Americans call 'petrol' as 'gas' and that's the reason why they call petrol stations as gas stations. But she refused to accept the fact. I gave up saying please look it up on the net and get some proper information. She reluctantly accepted that she was wrong (stupid!) Like I said in the previous post, she is a bit slow. She really doesn't get simple things, always asks some stupid questions from time to time inspite of the a certain thing being just told! Well I will have to put up with this for a year. I am ready for the fight anyway.

Will order some food now, really hungry. Feeling a bit dodgy today, a bit lonely. Was great talking to my folks after a few days. Well more later.

Pune-Bouveret-Zurich-Montreux-Louisville!!

2009-01-19T03:46:00.002+05:30

I'm back and in the US (surprisingly). The journey was ok, had one of my schoolmate with me so was not boring at all. Once in US, was so lucky to have all sorts of delays at the Newark and Chicago airport, bad weather being the first. Everything was so mismanaged, no proper notifications that the flights were running late. The transition here was OK, slowly getting used to the American way of life(blaahhh), Europe was and is way better. The only thing is that US is cheaper than CH. I will say that I am lucky to get something over here, most of mes amis don't have anything on their hands as yet. I hope they all get here soon, it will be one hell of a party. All the best to all of them, they will surely find something soon.

I'm in Louisville, KY. Its a cool place, not too hectic. Plenty of stuff to do around here apart from work. I have to look for some kind of a sports club or just a gym. Good food, friendly and helpful locals, alcohol (Bourbon Country baby!!!). I'm content. On the downside, many homeless people here; always asking one for some money, food or a ciggy. One of them even asked me n my friend while we were walking around whether we were willing to share a beer with him in a pub he was standing outside!!! Dodgy!!! The picture over here is the view of the downtown skyline as seen from my hotel room.

Well I am staying in the hotel itself, all expenses paid till I move into an apartment after I get my SSN. Its cool, staff are very very casual; so casual that the waiters even ask each other whether one of them wants to step out for a smoke. And all this right in front of the guests! Well food in the hotel is great, huge portions. Not much to do in the room apart from watching TV. And there is an Indian girl working here, starting at the same time as me. To be frank, she is a bit annoying, doesn't get plain english that much, asks too many questions, has a funny lisp and has no idea of how even the simplest things work in this world. (Murkha ahe!!) Well the only Indian in the hotel apart from moi so no more complaints.

More later as will figure out things here. Plus tôt...

Pune-Bouveret-Zurich-Bouveret-Montreux-Pune-?

2008-10-07T15:50:00.002+05:30

I am back! Well not as said but the point is I am back after nearly 6 months. Writing this from Doha en-route Bombay. After a not so comfortable flight from Zurich(which I will miss dearly along with all my First Family/Dudes n Dudettes), I have to wait 17h 30 mins till my next 4 hr flight home. Well this is the first time in a middle-eastern airport, and I came to the conclusion: Welcome to little India!! Well the whole bloody airport is ran by Indians. From help desks, cafes, lounges, the maintainance staff even including a few in security. Well the official language is Tamil and all her sisters from the South! Its so funny,even though pretty far away from mainland India, I feel as if I am home, but I am thinking why am I not home? The announcers have a heavy Indian accent, its funny to be in an Arabic country and hear Indian languages.

The airline has not provided anything for the 17 hr stopover. Opinions were divided if i am entitled to eat food by just showing my boarding pass. Well in the lounge right now, pretty good, comfortable and quiet. Food is ok, soft drinks are unlimited, so if coffee and a limited choice of deserts(no proper meal though), internet is ok as well. All at a price of 40 USD or 140 QaR!! I dont really give a damn! Going home after leaving Switzerland, really sad(will be for a long time,missing ya all since I decided to fly back!!), then on the move again. C'est la vie et c'est vrai!

Well have one more hour here in the lounge, then will go around and have a look. Dunno what I am going to do? Shop? was not able to shop for anything, for anyone! lets see.

More later!!!

Another year (actually two)

2008-02-16T00:13:00.002+05:30

Another year, so far some things are going great. Are they?

What the problem is, even I am unable to guess. Its about a person or say several ones. When help is needed I selflessly helped, went out of the way fucked myself up and didn’t ask anything in return. Well if I did it selflessly, then why am I writing about that is the question? I don’t have a problem in helping others, but I just want one thing in return....it is said that a person have friends, I believe that. But off late my belief is in question. I like a girl (whenever) something always has to go wrong. Then someone else gets the advantage of being with or comforting her.......

It has always been like this. Still lets see what happens :)

I will be back....

2008-02-16T00:08:00.002+05:30

I can't change the past, so I'm going to change the future. Well I can't see what's in store for me in future, but that doesn't mean it's not there!!!!

Missing you all back home, love you all!
Take care.

Ameya

Another year (actually two)

2008-02-01T00:13:00.000+05:30

Another year, so far some things are going great. Are they?

It has always been like this. Still lets see what happens :)

It's straight from the office...u'll hate it!

2006-09-11T03:38:00.000+05:30

I froze your tear and made a dagger
and stabbed it in my cock forever
it stays there like Excaliber
Are you my Arthur?
Say you are

Take this cool, dark, steel-ed blade
Steal it
Sheath it in your lake
I'd drown with you to be together
Must you breathe?
Cos i need heaven

hahaha makes no sense, just like many other things!

Expectations?

2006-09-08T04:02:00.000+05:30

Why are you hiding, you are still right there in my mind, like a ghost in my dreams. I do feel like writing to you or call you but I can’t as I don’t know why? I have so much in my head that I expect to go away from me, at least?

If I cry for help, will you still hold out your arms for me, talk like we used to before? If I tell you all the things, would you still ever love me, hold me & tell all the things you want to tell me? I can no longer refuse the facts, as they all are swimming tirelessly in my head. Have to accept the temptations as I sit here alone, with my mind wondering, wandering, expecting…

No one is watching me, so no one knows as I slip into my own seclusion & fool around with my own illusions. Reality is not so far away from me now as I feel my imminent future; reality does make its presence felt, as always I expect things out of my bounds…

My body slips far from my restless, mindless conclusions; I wonder if there will be at least any silly solutions. As I am making a fool of myself sometimes; just as I did yesterday (that’s what I think, how could I respond, it’s been a long time, been hurt) How can I make a decision, I miss you but I am right in the middle of the persons I like, even you may be. Well I have you to be with me, that’s what I think again & again

Can I still be yours? Well if you deny me this plea, it leaves me nowhere to go. But...

I really expect to be in your arms, feeling free, I will be as this love (?) for me is as real as it can be, to love you even if you won't and love you for all of eternity….but who cares/dares to love for ever***...times change and so do people!

The "True" Bullshit

2006-05-29T22:02:00.000+05:30

I write love with my hands raised to praise,
I write laughter to try and drive away the haze.
I write sorrow to try and make the world cry,
I write the truth to try and touch the skies.
I write the lies to deceive your simple mind,
I write for evil to tell you about our kind.
I write for God to show us the holy light,
I write pride to help you along lifes fight.
Yes, I write this bullshit to stay forever alive,
but people judging this shit is what makes me laugh.

"I will live forever in my mind..."

Destiny???

2006-04-26T02:22:00.000+05:30

Such twisted fate of instantaneous destruction, such evil lies within this horrible idiotic construction.
Dealing the certain fate, the cruel hand of loves lost, the devil fucking your mind to show you who's boss.
Just another bottle of my new pals, whiskey, beer, and the thoughts go away to fill this breach beyond reach.
To believe in such things as destiny, love and fate, only makes this heart feel so used and second rate.
The moral of this story about destiny when life feels sunk?
Don't fucking write when you're so fucking drunk.

hahahaha more later!!

WhAt MySteRy Is ThIs?!

2006-04-10T03:28:00.001+05:30

What mystery is this thing called love? Many know how elusive it is! The years of my searching are numbered in the minds of women/girls, but this mean heart knows no time, only the pain of loneliness.
God, where can I find the answers to my longing, the balance between spirit and flesh. My soul feels like an ocean without water, vast in its emptiness. Its depth exposed, parched by the sun of my own desire. Cryptic visions from my dreams haunt me most of the time,still something urges me to be hopeful.
Where shall I find these answers? Who will answer these moans? The tears of my heart seem like rivers, seeking to fill the void in my soul. I pray from time to time, that this melancholy in life may be shortened, when I will know the meeting of two hearts, again. When??

Here I go....

2006-03-30T02:49:00.000+05:30

Well was planning to write for such a long time, thought of many things to write and kinda clear my mind space but have forgotten most of them. The thing is, I am going on my way, that’s for sure, I guess, a step closer to my dreams. Well many other dreams were broken or will be in the course of time, but who hears the sighs of these broken dreams anyway but moi. I say..

Dreams are very powerful things, full of feelings, words and thoughts,
Some are great, fascinating wonderful, others sad, horrifying awful,
For I can relate to both of these, for I have dreams!

Now it will never be the same again. I mean the things which were over all these years, will never be the same ever again. (Oh, what a discovery!) Well things do change with time, I know that. However, leaving all this (of 25 years) and to move on along with all the memories of family, friends and all other things, is going to be tough. But many people have done this and even I can. Just a matter of around 2 years anyway, still it is a big deal. I just hope to be successful and all that goodie stuff;).

Now for some not so good part. I am feeling very funny nowadays. If only, I could tell …I’ll try though. Nevertheless, it’s a change and change is good sometimes, I think. In addition, the point I had stated in some earlier posts is, any girl I like is either…. It proves to be true most of the time, even it was very true this time. The other day my friends somehow managed to guess a thing or two about me. Again, putting me in some turmoil. Why do I wait, I must just go ahead when I feel like. On the other hand, even I maybe a bit reluctant(and I tend too think too much about it and take a lot of time to make up my mind) and not so daring in these kinda matters, if you know what I mean. But, no one cares. I think I will just pack up and leave, the best possible solution. This is of no use, I’ve a feeling that I’ve been misunderstood(though it’s not new to me)this time too; I don’t want to mess up things and friendships(?) is just too hard to sort things out; I know and I’ve been through it. I just want to leave all that as is and if people are so stubborn and not willing to listen, I won’t care about them anyway!

People generally say, who will waste time just falling in love, getting hurt (I have more than enough for my share) and cry about it and vow never to fall in love, in turn falling in love again with a wrong person. Think logically and you will get to know. I think love is a game of chance, you’ll never find the right/perfect person always, we all have to take chances and keep ourselves open to love(now even I don’t know where this leads too actually).I say love is abundantly available, feel free to waste/use it, liberally (Any comments?!). Even if I fall in love, I don’t think she will wait for two years and just waste/wait her love. I just remembered a few lines from a song, which I think you will guess: …..who cares to love forever….who waits forever anyway!(wow how well it goes with all this haha)

No harm in being single despite the fact that it’s another case if u are with someone. So is just asking her out will be of no harm, as I have nothing to lose. It doesn’t work all the time though. If I do ask the girl (who I know for sometime) and she says no it will surely mess up whatever the friendship there was/is between us. That I do not want. I don’t want to create any tensions as solving them may even take a lifetime, like I said before.

I really hope things get sorted out, hope to have another chance at it. As it is things always tend to go wrong with me. All that u see above my be confused but who cares. Will be back with more not so interesting thoughts or even something else, something new. Till next time.

Please don’t mind all that above, as when I read it myself, it makes a little less sense!!

Slow Dance

2006-02-23T01:09:00.000+05:30

have you ever watched kids on a merry-go-round?
or listened to the rain slapping on the ground?
ever followed a butterfly's erratic flight?
or gazed at the moon into the night?

do you run through each day on the fly?
when you ask, "How are you?" Do you hear the reply?
when the day is done, do you lie in your bed
with the next hundred chores running through your head?

ever told your loved ones, 'Will do it tomorrow?'
and in your haste, not see their sorrow?
ever lost touch, let a good friendship die
cause you never had time to keep in touch or say "Hi"?

when you run so fast to get somewhere
you miss half the fun of getting there.
when you worry and hurry through your day,
it is like an unopened gift thrown away.

life is not a race,you'd better slow down.
do take it slower,don't dance so fast.
hear the music,it won't last.
'coz time we all have is short.

Dream!

2006-02-20T00:32:00.000+05:30

I stood there, trying to understand it all. This is it, I thought. This is where it all ends.
I heard a sound behind me. Closing my eyes, I screamed...
I woke up.
Blearily, I turned and looked at the clock on the study table beside me. 9.35. I'm late, I thought.
I got up, my back leaving a faint outline of sweat on the sheets. It was winter. Folding the blanket, I thought about the dream. It seemed so real. How could a dream be so real?
I shuddered and put the blanket aside and the pillow on top of it.
I remembered about her. She should be waiting for me now at the cafe. I had promised to meet her so that we could have breakfast together.
I reached for my cell phone and dialed her number.
"Hey ?, it's me."
"What?"
"It's me. I'll be bit late."
"Wrong number."
I dialed again. Slowly.
"?-"
"Wrong number."
Could she have lent her cell phone to one of her friends? I thought. But I just called her last night. Or maybe she has lost her cell phone on the way and someone picked it up. Never mind, I'll find out soon.
I took off my shorts and searched for my jeans. I remember hanging them behind the door last night before I slept. But they weren't there now. I looked inside the closet and under the study table. Perhaps Mother had put them to wash. Damn it, I thought. I hate it when she sneaks into my room and tries to clean it.
Sighing, I took out another pair of jeans from the closet and slipped into them. I couldn't recall buying these though. Mother must have bought them for me, not the color I wanted. But I felt comfortable in them. I hoped she wouldn't mind buying them next time, in blue.
I glanced at the clock. 9.42. Enough time to brush my teeth. I went into the bathroom.
"What the-" I retreated, my legs knocked against the toilet. Falling, I grabbed the basin and balanced myself.
I looked at the face in the mirror again.
It can't be, I thought. I rubbed my eyes, held the face and pinched the cheeks. It can't be.
I got out of the bathroom. I picked up the cell phone, wanting to call Dad or Mother, but the battery had gone flat. I tried the door but it was locked. I searched for the door key in the closet's drawer and the room, but the key was missing.
I stood there, trying to understand it all.
A dream, I thought. A bad dream...
I woke up.

Who the hell was she!?? Who knows?

Am I in Love?

2006-02-02T01:29:00.000+05:30

Today I am not feeling well. I mean I am fine health wise, but some baddish feeling is there somewhere and because of that feeling, I am getting a bit irritated. I have too many things on my mind and nearly all of them are important. I am not that suitable frame of mind at this moment to handle all this. I know I can handle it, but it will surely take some time. And time is what I don’t have. I am not dying or anything, but I roughly have 4 months in which I have to settle at least half of these dilemmas. I am royally messed up and all confused. I do not even know if what I am writing is making any sense!

One thing I am sure of is that I am a bit closer to what I want in terms of my career. I hope that it will be done with minimum hassles. I am trying hard to get it.
The other thing; girls. Why won’t a normal person, not want to be with girls, want to fall in love at this age? There I used the much-dreaded word, ‘LOVE’. And this is bugging me greatly. I feel that I am lonely and really need someone to get over the loneliness now. I want to fall in love. It has been a long time since I have been in love (Don’t know if it was love, it was a long
time back). I do have a crush on someone I know, call it infatuation, obsession, passion (all mean the same I guess) or anything else, I don’t care. And I hope I know what it exactly is soon. I am interested in making a move (if you get what I mean), but there are other priorities that need to be taken care of first. Moreover, if I have to take care of that, all this will have to wait for another 3 years or so, and then it would be late. This may be the punishment I get, for the misdoings in the past and I know I have to overcome them at any cost. And I will pull it off, somehow. That’s what I think.
It is not that I don’t have the guts (I agree, better say I don’t have some guts) to talk to the girl. Nevertheless, when I do, I’m unable to convey my feelings in a proper way to her. I just want to ask her out, for a coffee or something and then may be know what she thinks. It’s not that it would rush things, friends can/do go out right? Only if I could tell her! Another thing is that I am a bit afraid to get hurt; I have been hurt more times, than I could think of deserving. I know that there are many girls out there but I certainly don’t have that much time to go after them to find the ONE. I know many girls with whom I would like to talk; but I think most of them are out of the league. And amongst it all, the girls I like are either engaged, going around or not interested at all. Most of the girls my age are nowhere to be seen. Still I could feel that I am in love (I think I am), yet all those things seem too far away from me. So close, but how far! What should I do? How can I find out if anyone out there likes me? (Not the ones I don’t want to be with ever) How can I ask her out once? I have a feeling that she won’t, still I’m an optimistic about it.

Words like marriage, family, money, job and other responsibilities are crossing my mind and scaring the shit out of me. I can’t avoid them either. As the matter of fact, in about 4-5 years or so I have to face them head on and embrace them. Let’s hope for the best.

If you don’t get it, forget it? (What I have written that is!)
More next time.

Happy New Year?!

2006-01-01T22:58:00.000+05:30

Well it’s that time of the year again. I still cannot describe precisely how I feel. I am confused, irritated, sad, and a bit happy! Well all of it and many more of other things I am feeling. Another year is ending, much like previous 2-3 years. Not very fruitful year for me in some ways. Very unexpected things happened this time around. I am still much far away from what I want and I really hope things get sorted with a comforting pace. They say it is never too late. Hope; that is the best I can do and just try to make things happen the way I want them to be. I want to do it for someone I really cared for but was unable to do it when I should have done it in the first place. I’m sorry. And also for a someone who cared for all of us and who is now cared for. I miss you all.

Enough of this serious stuff. When most of the people are busy organizing plans for the New Year’s Eve, I really have not decided anything yet. What can I decide? What I really want is to spend the day with my close friends. Many are out if the country and the rest here. All the time I keep saying that, this is, probably the last time we all will be together. Each one is going to go there own way the next year, for work or studies. It’s not like that we will never meet again but as we all have our priorities set and well have to think seriously about our future, it is going to be very difficult. However, some of the people do not understand what they are going to miss in the coming days. They still think that a ‘party’ is more important than friends are. Well the whole year some people are partying nearly 3 days of the week. When they will know, it will be late to understand what I really meant to say.

I don’t’ think it is hard to follow what I have written. And it’s not that I am jealous, I just care more about my friends than a party where I’m not invited. Even if I do not have money to flaunt, I do have my dignity, self-respect and my conscience to answer. Simple.

Anyway, like people are going to change?

Well I wish every one of my friends a very Healthy, Happy and Prosperous New Year! May all your dreams come true. Take care people!

Hope to write as frequent as possible, much like a journal/diary

Smile?? :)

2005-11-15T22:21:00.000+05:30

Smile is what most of them say. Even if you are upset,smile. C'mon, never get angry or what? This is stupid. Is this a kind of 'Neo-Gandhism' or what? And I may be wrong, but I consider anger an emotion.

Well anger is an emotion along with all the other emos. Moreover, it is a very important element in anyone’s life. If you don’t ever get angry, you are already dead! Then what should we do of anger? One should know how to control and channel his/her anger properly in order to smile after that. Anyway, should not all of these emotions/expressions be part of one's life? There should be a balance of all emotions, I say, otherwise if the emotional equilibrium collapses everyone knows what shit happens. Still many people say don't get angry just smile and forget it? Forget what? The insults and all that crap dumped on you at work, by friends and family, etc. And when they get angry no one sees that. Only a person’s anger is singled out many times. Well enough of that, now I’m getting angry. What I want to say remains as it is.

I sometimes hate the people for saying this five-letter word. Smile, as if it's that simple. Life is not always a photo opportunity to smile each and every time. If only it was that easy for everything to change in one facial expression. I wish that by turning up the corners of my mouth, I could change who I am, what and how I feel, what I want and everything stirring up inside my head.

Well about my much-awaited break from the routine, I still haven’t got the time  and hopefully I will as I’m going to Goa for work. Well forget it; things will get back to normal. All of them. I hope.

Haha as if smiling were the solution. Smile heeeeeeeeeeeeee

More later :)

The Biggest (Stupidest) Loser!

2005-10-31T01:12:00.000+05:30

What kind of people are the biggest losers? Apart from the normal kind, I just came to know of a new kind of losers, generally called as The (really, really) Stupid Losers. Moreover, currently they have a new leader.
There is a person I know who belongs to the above category. I think friends are the most important assets you can ever lose in your life. Well a person can make new friends but it’s always very difficult to actually forget the old ones or break relations them. And if the person leaves around 40-50 good friends (girls and boys) all in one go, all at a single time; just to play with boys his own age (15-16 years old maybe physically, mental age unknown), with no justified reason, is the personification of silliness. And what do you call such a person? Well calling him stupid is an insult to all the less stupid people. Still we will use the word and term him as the “World’s worst and really the stupidest loser ever”. It may sound silly but please….
And I don’t understand. How can a person forget all that his friends have done for him? They have helped him in so many ways. On the other hand, how can one forget the times spent together, tolerating his stupid behavior and stuff. Or the harmless teasing and bantering, practical jokes, etc. There are bound to be some problems. Then what might be the reasons that may lead to this level of idiocy? Whatever the reasons maybe, they should be solid and believable. I mean a person, who can’t at times think for himself, take such a drastically brainless decision, which I am sure he will repent for the remainder of his life. Who will tolerate him elsewhere? I think, only an external influence can do this. And if this influence is coming from a girl/woman, then it is even more unintelligent. History tells us that in nearly half of the world’s troubles, women have played an important part. Well ladies no offence meant and I’m sorry, please don’t mind.
Basically it doesn’t matter if that person leaves, he was not forced to stay. Even when being so close to people, the absence is not going to be missed at all. And as rightly said, all these times he was just putting up a show for all others of how nice or good he is. Well whatever.

Just one thing for the person concerned, Leave!! Do whatever you wish, who cares? No one will care basically. It seems you never belonged here anyway. Play! We’ll see how you do it all by yourself. Good Luck! But I’ll say, think! It’s never late to rectify your stupid mistakes instead of regretting them later. If not they will come back to haunt you all your bloody life and you will know how good that was back there. If you ever realize that, it will be very late. Ha ha ha ha

,|,,

Royal Screw Up!!Sounds better :)

2005-10-29T00:30:00.000+05:30

{ Well most of what written below had to be rewritten because of the overwhelming response it got. Well many people thought I was on the verge of a break down or I have lost it completely, which is not the case. I'm as good as I ever was. I just wrote what I thought and it doesn't matter much. So I had to edit it and pull up most of it. Too personal I guess. Please look at it as a piece of fiction/senseless writing as most of it is and overlook it. Thank you very much :) }

Life sucks. Most people's lives do normally but mine is really sucking right now. I can literally hear the sucking sound, a royal screw up you can say!

It seems whatever I do I tend to be unsuccessfull. Whether be it work, play or even, well trying to get a girl or any other thing, I'm screwing up royally. However, I know I am not that bad at all this but I do not know what's gotten into me nowadays. I don't know why all this is happening. Nevertheless, the thing I don't get is my stint with girls. In the past 8 years, whichever girls I liked or say loved were either taken, engaged or got married and very few were not at all interested. Ah, crap! I will see to that myself and deal with that issue properly. And yes, I did try. Hard! But I will still keep on trying. Anyway, I still don't get it; How much money does a person need to be happy? What is the problem then?

Well that is not all. Whatever I say these days is either unnoticed, unheard of or is often misunderstood. I can't even convey what I really want to say. (I understood. So rewritingitng it) A simple sentence I say/write transforms into an argument or anything else which I did not expect. With all these nice things happening, I feel miserable. I think misery is insisting on my company. Ha ha ha. Anyway, my temper is slowly slipping out of my control lately and so is my health I guess. In addition to my woes, there are things that I was sure of doing until a couple of days back. Now I am having second thoughts about them. And only on the work front, all is well and I wish it stays that way. Let's hope all things will get sorted.
They say, 'It's just one of those days'. I'll say, it's like a routine for me for the past month or so.

Maybe I should stop right now and take a break from all this! Maybe it will work out. Maybe?!?

Another thing. A very important declaration.
Some people have lost their sense of humor!!
Well if you find it, please return it to them cordially.
In the mean time, do not mess with any of them.
If you do, expect some really dodgy reactions.

<< Any resemblance to any one is purposefully coincidental >>

I Hate Mobile Phones.Aaargh!! Hmmm...Do I?

2005-10-09T00:12:00.000+05:30

A year or two back, perhaps I was the only person in the world who had absolutely no desire to own one, let alone tolerate one.

It seems like 99% of the people who have them only have them because they believe it will impress everyone else. Wrong. No one cares if you have a tiny phone or one with a camera or any other phone with shitty stuff with you, no one honestly does! Even the rickshaw wallas and bus conductors have phones!

Mobiles do not = social status.

Now days people are always on their mobiles, I mean always talking on the phone. They chat about where they are, what they did that day, what they have planned for dinner, etc. But...perhaps I'm wrong, but I don't see the point of ringing up a rather large phone bill just so you can chat with your mates about the events of the day when you can do that much cheaper at home or just meet up at some place and go on blabbering about all.

If one were a parent, or some businessperson or a doctor that needs to be contacted all the time, they would probably have one. Otherwise, I do not see or never saw the point.

Moreover, people driving/riding with them...I cannot count how many times I have nearly been run over or been hold up behind a nutcase who was "driving/riding" and talking on their mobile. This is dangerous for other pedestrians. Why can’t they just stop to the side giving proper signal and talk the bloody day out? However, most people don’t. Therefore, I do my part to teach them a lesson or just piss them off. Whenever I see anyone talking on mobile while driving/riding, I just put my finger on the horn of me vehicle. Haha that really does the trick. Still a much dangerous way is just drive by very close to them, look back, and see the fun.

In addition, some people just don’t even have the common sense to not use the phones when in libraries, hospitals, theaters, temples, etc. and disturb other innocent people who eventually become the victims of their conversations. Alternatively, just keep the mobiles on silent mode and if anyone has the urge to talk go in some bloody corner and talk softly.

Well I've had people tell me I'm just bitter because I didn’t have one at that time. Err...no. The reason I didn’t own one was because I thought I did not need one. If I honestly wanted to talk to someone, I would find a pay phone. On the other hand, use the phone at home or office if I am not out and about.

But well things changed. I had to buy one anyway for some reason. Well it did help me in many ways but monetarily it hasn’t helped me a bit. It's gotten ridiculous, really ridiculous. It has become a necessity and a curse.

Heck, who cares. The words above are not going to change the situation. They might change my views but still I don’t even know whether I really need the mobile or not. Until then I will manage by using it and spending a good amount of money to feed and keep it ringing.

Till next time...

25 years in the making

2005-06-16T23:59:00.000+05:30

Well it is my 25th birthday today. My 25th milestone in this journey we all call 'life'. Boy that was not at all a smooth one. I stop for a while and take a look in both directions, to see how far I have come and how far I still have to go. More on that in the later posts. Down below is what I think of it:

i sit with hope,
yet losing touch with my dreams,
knowing i may not have another chance,
not knowing whether my soul is there or has died.

i need something else, someone else,
anything, anyone,
a change of heart, a change of mind,
whatever it takes, I’ll do it.

i need a new me, a new face, a new name,
will new clothes make me a better person?
will new friends make me better?
will i become someone else?
will do anything to escape this….

still have to go on with life,
with nothing to live for as of now,
just a day at a time, my soul slowly dies.
every night my mind cries,
knowing i have tried and i cannot lie to myself,
and always hoping for the one little opportunity,
will someday come alive.

a mistake twenty-five years in the making,
now it's a little too late.

Thank you all!!!!
I don't know whether you all will ever get what I've spilled up there, do try and if u dont please ask me.Don't come to any other conclusion. Still I've written it, it's mine all mine!!! hahahahahaha :)

Is ignorance bliss!! Is it really??

2005-06-15T23:45:00.000+05:30

Two of my friends said something today that got me thinking. Sounds of impulses charging through started coming from my head. Well I do think a lot but not doing much lately. This heat is killing me. Anyway, the first was the question, “So what’s it better, depressed, unfunny intelligence or happy, carefree stupidity?” The basic essence of the question is that an intelligent person’s observation of things often leads to severe unhappiness, probably because they can see the but obvious faults or shortcomings in everything. Is that ignorance? Is that bliss? Do you agree?

I mean, wouldn’t it be great not to care much or know every aspect about anything that is not directly relevant to yourself or anyone at any one time? Not when phrased like that it would not, but how about:

-Not caring/knowing about the fact that over 3 million people died of AIDS last year.

-Not caring/knowing about human kind’s bloody and quite frankly disgusting history.

-Not caring/knowing of the fact how misleading the whole system is.

Then my friend (who is a bit philosophically inclined) did that cunning thing where he lead me into believing one argument when actuallly factually his views were the exact opposite, and then he just trapped me. He made a distinction (philosophical) between higher and lower joy (Material joy and stuff, you know?). Lower joy is a kind of animal/primitive joy, a nice thing, but is always confined, mainly to basic physical needs. Higher joy is something else, something unique to especially to humans, something that can only be achieved by creativity and mental stimulation and other stuff. We rounded off the conversation a fitting conclusion:

HIM: Well, the dog that has just had his food, and is lying in the sun will feel damn good.

ME: But if the dog that realizes how Mozart's symphonies, the Theory of relativity and/or The Matrix trilogy(which I still haven't understood!), all linked together, won’t he feel like, his distant cousin, an absolute tiger?

HIM: Exactly I say. Ekdum barobar!!

Confused? Well just ignore it,like amny other things. I do it sometimes too. It really helps haha.

But ignorance is not an excuse.
And if you think education is expensive -- try ignorance.

And I doubt that you would not have read this or will ever read what I write in the future, whatever it may be; if it were more than a page? Do read, it will help you gain some useless knowledge so prevalent in this world!

<<~inspireD writinG~>>

Thank God!

2005-05-22T23:43:00.000+05:30

I think I have been blessed
And I feel like I've found my way
I thank God for all I've been given
At the end of every day

I think I have been blessed
With so much more than I deserve
To be here with the ones that love me
To love them so much it hurts!!

Ameya