Good one

http://sumeetkeswani.wordpress.com/2014/04/08/dear-women-all-men-arent-assholes/

So true....

Love or true love. Trust or money.

Well I am back again.

More to follow

What's the matter?

I still haven't found a job. I don't have time. What am I doing wrong? Why is it so hard to just get a job!!

Still hoping that things work out soon.

in reference to: CommuniGate Pro ritz.edu Entrance (view on Google Sidewiki)

Hopeless...Confused....Still hoping!

I don't know whats wrong. Its like i just hit a wall. I don't know what to do, how and where to start. What will happen in the next moments. Its like I am just forced to go with the flow and I am hopelessly flowing with it. What's in it for me??!!! How will I get what I hoped for!!!?

I really hope that I pull it all together, as soon as possible. Time is changing sides.

One of these mornings, Won't be very long, You will look for me, And I'll be gone.

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Payday^

Well I got my first pay check here. Man, they have paydays every two weeks. That’s so cool. Never have to wait an entire month to see money in your account!! Still waiting for my SSN. Will have a phone and internet then. So eager to get back in touch with my world again.

Never underestimate the predictability of stupidity!! B-T T

More in the near future.

Nostalgia!??

I really don’t know what prompted me to write this. I guess, it was long overdue. Anyway, it’s so weird; I just felt like writing all this down but really don’t have appropriate words to describe it. Well slowly settling in Louisville, work is good. Don’t know many people here yet, apart from work really have nothing to do. And it’s very cold, worse than Switzerland actually.

Well, I was listening to some Hindi songs. Jaane Tu Ya Jaane Na (2008) movie/soundtrack, I remembered that when Dad and I were on our way to Mumbai we watched this one on the bus. We went to meet Mama (uncle); I was going to see him after nearly 2.5 years. It was so good to see them all. But the song which really brought everything up in my mind is the song from the movie Kismet Connection (2008). I remembered that day, 09/01/2009, Friday. Dad and I saw this movie on the bus on the way back to Pune from Mumbai. I have such a dodgy feeling right now. Nevertheless, at that time it hit me hard, real hard that I had just 1 week to leave for US. It was a very memorable trip with my Dad. We had to walk quiet a lot because of the nationwide truckers’ strike and because of that there was no fuel in Mumbai. So no taxis just buses and they were so packed. It was stressful, but some way or the other we made it everywhere that too on time. Thanks to Dad, he is such a great chap. Well he also got a new car the day we left for the visa, 08/01/2009. It was so great…

Then we were back again in Mumbai, nearly a week after with the new car. You know, no matter how much time I (you) spend with your parents or even in Pune (at home), it’s always too less. I (you) always wish that I (you) could have some more time to spend and I will be with all of the folks back home. I hope you agree. But well…

Thanks Dad, Mom I could never had done all this without your unconditional support. I owe you so much; words are not capable of describing it. I miss you so much. Not forgetting, all my friends back home and all of you who I met in Suisse. It’s always great to think about all the times we all spent together. I wish that it may never end and we continue to have great time and keep bumping into each other frequently!! Hope to see you all soon. Time flies you know.

Missing Pune, Bouveret, Zurich and Montreux very much.

Take care ya’ll!!

Of gas, fake fish and stuff...

Officially starting work tomorrow. The coworkers seem nice, lets see how they really are in due course. Signed the lease for the apartment, opened an account, shopped at Walmart for apartment supplies and the only thing remaining is the phone. I will have that after I get my SSN.

Yesterday, I was at the doctor for the mandatory pre-employment drug test with my colleague. I saw on the TV an astonishing news. I am sure, anything and mostly everything weird has to happen in the US!! The news was about fake olive oil, fake chips and fake fish!! In many places, there was fake fish being sold in the market; namely salmon and cod. The fish meat is artificially flavored and colored. So ridiculous!! I thought India and China were good in this, but hats off to the guys in US.

Anyway the other day I was having coffee with my Indian colleague. She said the most awesomely brilliant thing. The conversation went,"They should start this in India, its so like clean, you know." I say,"What should they start?" "They use 'gas' as fuel here, everything runs on it, not petrol!" I reply,"Yes we have that in India as well, but mostly buses or taxis run on CNG (gas) as fuel, but we use mostly petrol or diesel for vehicles. She started arguing and tried to prove her point that we don't use 'gas' in India as fuel for vehicles. Then I realized what she meant, she misunderstood 'gas' (GASOLINE) as gas (CNG). When I said its the same as petrol as Americans call 'petrol' as 'gas' and that's the reason why they call petrol stations as gas stations. But she refused to accept the fact. I gave up saying please look it up on the net and get some proper information. She reluctantly accepted that she was wrong (stupid!) Like I said in the previous post, she is a bit slow. She really doesn't get simple things, always asks some stupid questions from time to time inspite of the a certain thing being just told! Well I will have to put up with this for a year. I am ready for the fight anyway.

Will order some food now, really hungry. Feeling a bit dodgy today, a bit lonely. Was great talking to my folks after a few days. Well more later.

Pune-Bouveret-Zurich-Montreux-Louisville!!

I'm back and in the US (surprisingly). The journey was ok, had one of my schoolmate with me so was not boring at all. Once in US, was so lucky to have all sorts of delays at the Newark and Chicago airport, bad weather being the first. Everything was so mismanaged, no proper notifications that the flights were running late. The transition here was OK, slowly getting used to the American way of life(blaahhh), Europe was and is way better. The only thing is that US is cheaper than CH. I will say that I am lucky to get something over here, most of mes amis don't have anything on their hands as yet. I hope they all get here soon, it will be one hell of a party. All the best to all of them, they will surely find something soon.

I'm in Louisville, KY. Its a cool place, not too hectic. Plenty of stuff to do around here apart from work. I have to look for some kind of a sports club or just a gym. Good food, friendly and helpful locals, alcohol (Bourbon Country baby!!!). I'm content. On the downside, many homeless people here; always asking one for some money, food or a ciggy. One of them even asked me n my friend while we were walking around whether we were willing to share a beer with him in a pub he was standing outside!!! Dodgy!!! The picture over here is the view of the downtown skyline as seen from my hotel room.

Well I am staying in the hotel itself, all expenses paid till I move into an apartment after I get my SSN. Its cool, staff are very very casual; so casual that the waiters even ask each other whether one of them wants to step out for a smoke. And all this right in front of the guests! Well food in the hotel is great, huge portions. Not much to do in the room apart from watching TV. And there is an Indian girl working here, starting at the same time as me. To be frank, she is a bit annoying, doesn't get plain english that much, asks too many questions, has a funny lisp and has no idea of how even the simplest things work in this world. (Murkha ahe!!) Well the only Indian in the hotel apart from moi so no more complaints.

More later as will figure out things here. Plus tôt...

Pune-Bouveret-Zurich-Bouveret-Montreux-Pune-?

I am back! Well not as said but the point is I am back after nearly 6 months. Writing this from Doha en-route Bombay. After a not so comfortable flight from Zurich(which I will miss dearly along with all my First Family/Dudes n Dudettes), I have to wait 17h 30 mins till my next 4 hr flight home. Well this is the first time in a middle-eastern airport, and I came to the conclusion: Welcome to little India!! Well the whole bloody airport is ran by Indians. From help desks, cafes, lounges, the maintainance staff even including a few in security. Well the official language is Tamil and all her sisters from the South! Its so funny,even though pretty far away from mainland India, I feel as if I am home, but I am thinking why am I not home? The announcers have a heavy Indian accent, its funny to be in an Arabic country and hear Indian languages.

The airline has not provided anything for the 17 hr stopover. Opinions were divided if i am entitled to eat food by just showing my boarding pass. Well in the lounge right now, pretty good, comfortable and quiet. Food is ok, soft drinks are unlimited, so if coffee and a limited choice of deserts(no proper meal though), internet is ok as well. All at a price of 40 USD or 140 QaR!! I dont really give a damn! Going home after leaving Switzerland, really sad(will be for a long time,missing ya all since I decided to fly back!!), then on the move again. C'est la vie et c'est vrai!

Well have one more hour here in the lounge, then will go around and have a look. Dunno what I am going to do? Shop? was not able to shop for anything, for anyone! lets see.

More later!!!

Another year (actually two)

Another year, so far some things are going great. Are they?

What the problem is, even I am unable to guess. Its about a person or say several ones. When help is needed I selflessly helped, went out of the way fucked myself up and didn’t ask anything in return. Well if I did it selflessly, then why am I writing about that is the question? I don’t have a problem in helping others, but I just want one thing in return....it is said that a person have friends, I believe that. But off late my belief is in question. I like a girl (whenever) something always has to go wrong. Then someone else gets the advantage of being with or comforting her.......

It has always been like this. Still lets see what happens :)

I will be back....

I can't change the past, so I'm going to change the future. Well I can't see what's in store for me in future, but that doesn't mean it's not there!!!!

Missing you all back home, love you all!
Take care.

Ameya

Another year (actually two)

Another year, so far some things are going great. Are they?

What the problem is, even I am unable to guess. Its about a person or say several ones. When help is needed I selflessly helped, went out of the way fucked myself up and didn’t ask anything in return. Well if I did it selflessly, then why am I writing about that is the question? I don’t have a problem in helping others, but I just want one thing in return....it is said that a person have friends, I believe that. But off late my belief is in question. I like a girl (whenever) something always has to go wrong. Then someone else gets the advantage of being with or comforting her.......

It has always been like this. Still lets see what happens :)

It's straight from the office...u'll hate it!

I froze your tear and made a dagger
and stabbed it in my cock forever
it stays there like Excaliber
Are you my Arthur?
Say you are

Take this cool, dark, steel-ed blade
Steal it
Sheath it in your lake
I'd drown with you to be together
Must you breathe?
Cos i need heaven

hahaha makes no sense, just like many other things!

Expectations?

Why are you hiding, you are still right there in my mind, like a ghost in my dreams. I do feel like writing to you or call you but I can’t as I don’t know why? I have so much in my head that I expect to go away from me, at least?

If I cry for help, will you still hold out your arms for me, talk like we used to before? If I tell you all the things, would you still ever love me, hold me & tell all the things you want to tell me? I can no longer refuse the facts, as they all are swimming tirelessly in my head. Have to accept the temptations as I sit here alone, with my mind wondering, wandering, expecting…

No one is watching me, so no one knows as I slip into my own seclusion & fool around with my own illusions. Reality is not so far away from me now as I feel my imminent future; reality does make its presence felt, as always I expect things out of my bounds…

My body slips far from my restless, mindless conclusions; I wonder if there will be at least any silly solutions. As I am making a fool of myself sometimes; just as I did yesterday (that’s what I think, how could I respond, it’s been a long time, been hurt) How can I make a decision, I miss you but I am right in the middle of the persons I like, even you may be. Well I have you to be with me, that’s what I think again & again

Can I still be yours? Well if you deny me this plea, it leaves me nowhere to go. But...

I really expect to be in your arms, feeling free, I will be as this love (?) for me is as real as it can be, to love you even if you won't and love you for all of eternity….but who cares/dares to love for ever***...times change and so do people!

The "True" Bullshit

I write love with my hands raised to praise,
I write laughter to try and drive away the haze.
I write sorrow to try and make the world cry,
I write the truth to try and touch the skies.
I write the lies to deceive your simple mind,
I write for evil to tell you about our kind.
I write for God to show us the holy light,
I write pride to help you along lifes fight.
Yes, I write this bullshit to stay forever alive,
but people judging this shit is what makes me laugh.

"I will live forever in my mind..."

Destiny???

Such twisted fate of instantaneous destruction, such evil lies within this horrible idiotic construction.
Dealing the certain fate, the cruel hand of loves lost, the devil fucking your mind to show you who's boss.
Just another bottle of my new pals, whiskey, beer, and the thoughts go away to fill this breach beyond reach.
To believe in such things as destiny, love and fate, only makes this heart feel so used and second rate.
The moral of this story about destiny when life feels sunk?
Don't fucking write when you're so fucking drunk.

hahahaha more later!!

WhAt MySteRy Is ThIs?!

What mystery is this thing called love? Many know how elusive it is! The years of my searching are numbered in the minds of women/girls, but this mean heart knows no time, only the pain of loneliness.
God, where can I find the answers to my longing, the balance between spirit and flesh. My soul feels like an ocean without water, vast in its emptiness. Its depth exposed, parched by the sun of my own desire. Cryptic visions from my dreams haunt me most of the time,still something urges me to be hopeful.
Where shall I find these answers? Who will answer these moans? The tears of my heart seem like rivers, seeking to fill the void in my soul. I pray from time to time, that this melancholy in life may be shortened, when I will know the meeting of two hearts, again. When??

Here I go....

Well was planning to write for such a long time, thought of many things to write and kinda clear my mind space but have forgotten most of them. The thing is, I am going on my way, that’s for sure, I guess, a step closer to my dreams. Well many other dreams were broken or will be in the course of time, but who hears the sighs of these broken dreams anyway but moi. I say..

Dreams are very powerful things, full of feelings, words and thoughts,
Some are great, fascinating wonderful, others sad, horrifying awful,
For I can relate to both of these, for I have dreams!

Now it will never be the same again. I mean the things which were over all these years, will never be the same ever again. (Oh, what a discovery!) Well things do change with time, I know that. However, leaving all this (of 25 years) and to move on along with all the memories of family, friends and all other things, is going to be tough. But many people have done this and even I can. Just a matter of around 2 years anyway, still it is a big deal. I just hope to be successful and all that goodie stuff;).

Now for some not so good part. I am feeling very funny nowadays. If only, I could tell …I’ll try though. Nevertheless, it’s a change and change is good sometimes, I think. In addition, the point I had stated in some earlier posts is, any girl I like is either…. It proves to be true most of the time, even it was very true this time. The other day my friends somehow managed to guess a thing or two about me. Again, putting me in some turmoil. Why do I wait, I must just go ahead when I feel like. On the other hand, even I maybe a bit reluctant(and I tend too think too much about it and take a lot of time to make up my mind) and not so daring in these kinda matters, if you know what I mean. But, no one cares. I think I will just pack up and leave, the best possible solution. This is of no use, I’ve a feeling that I’ve been misunderstood(though it’s not new to me)this time too; I don’t want to mess up things and friendships(?) is just too hard to sort things out; I know and I’ve been through it. I just want to leave all that as is and if people are so stubborn and not willing to listen, I won’t care about them anyway!

People generally say, who will waste time just falling in love, getting hurt (I have more than enough for my share) and cry about it and vow never to fall in love, in turn falling in love again with a wrong person. Think logically and you will get to know. I think love is a game of chance, you’ll never find the right/perfect person always, we all have to take chances and keep ourselves open to love(now even I don’t know where this leads too actually).I say love is abundantly available, feel free to waste/use it, liberally (Any comments?!). Even if I fall in love, I don’t think she will wait for two years and just waste/wait her love. I just remembered a few lines from a song, which I think you will guess: …..who cares to love forever….who waits forever anyway!(wow how well it goes with all this haha)

No harm in being single despite the fact that it’s another case if u are with someone. So is just asking her out will be of no harm, as I have nothing to lose. It doesn’t work all the time though. If I do ask the girl (who I know for sometime) and she says no it will surely mess up whatever the friendship there was/is between us. That I do not want. I don’t want to create any tensions as solving them may even take a lifetime, like I said before.

I really hope things get sorted out, hope to have another chance at it. As it is things always tend to go wrong with me. All that u see above my be confused but who cares. Will be back with more not so interesting thoughts or even something else, something new. Till next time.

Please don’t mind all that above, as when I read it myself, it makes a little less sense!!

Slow Dance

have you ever watched kids on a merry-go-round?
or listened to the rain slapping on the ground?
ever followed a butterfly's erratic flight?
or gazed at the moon into the night?

do you run through each day on the fly?
when you ask, "How are you?" Do you hear the reply?
when the day is done, do you lie in your bed
with the next hundred chores running through your head?

ever told your loved ones, 'Will do it tomorrow?'
and in your haste, not see their sorrow?
ever lost touch, let a good friendship die
cause you never had time to keep in touch or say "Hi"?

when you run so fast to get somewhere
you miss half the fun of getting there.
when you worry and hurry through your day,
it is like an unopened gift thrown away.

life is not a race,you'd better slow down.
do take it slower,don't dance so fast.
hear the music,it won't last.
'coz time we all have is short.

Dream!

I stood there, trying to understand it all. This is it, I thought. This is where it all ends.
I heard a sound behind me. Closing my eyes, I screamed...
I woke up.
Blearily, I turned and looked at the clock on the study table beside me. 9.35. I'm late, I thought.
I got up, my back leaving a faint outline of sweat on the sheets. It was winter. Folding the blanket, I thought about the dream. It seemed so real. How could a dream be so real?
I shuddered and put the blanket aside and the pillow on top of it.
I remembered about her. She should be waiting for me now at the cafe. I had promised to meet her so that we could have breakfast together.
I reached for my cell phone and dialed her number.
"Hey ?, it's me."
"What?"
"It's me. I'll be bit late."
"Wrong number."
I dialed again. Slowly.
"?-"
"Wrong number."
Could she have lent her cell phone to one of her friends? I thought. But I just called her last night. Or maybe she has lost her cell phone on the way and someone picked it up. Never mind, I'll find out soon.
I took off my shorts and searched for my jeans. I remember hanging them behind the door last night before I slept. But they weren't there now. I looked inside the closet and under the study table. Perhaps Mother had put them to wash. Damn it, I thought. I hate it when she sneaks into my room and tries to clean it.
Sighing, I took out another pair of jeans from the closet and slipped into them. I couldn't recall buying these though. Mother must have bought them for me, not the color I wanted. But I felt comfortable in them. I hoped she wouldn't mind buying them next time, in blue.
I glanced at the clock. 9.42. Enough time to brush my teeth. I went into the bathroom.
"What the-" I retreated, my legs knocked against the toilet. Falling, I grabbed the basin and balanced myself.
I looked at the face in the mirror again.
It can't be, I thought. I rubbed my eyes, held the face and pinched the cheeks. It can't be.
I got out of the bathroom. I picked up the cell phone, wanting to call Dad or Mother, but the battery had gone flat. I tried the door but it was locked. I searched for the door key in the closet's drawer and the room, but the key was missing.
I stood there, trying to understand it all.
A dream, I thought. A bad dream...
I woke up.

Who the hell was she!?? Who knows?